Catching things and other subjects

Catching things

Not so long ago, there was a story about a guy who caught a baby being tossed outta window of a burning building. I discussed it in a private class I had recently. In the class, the student mentioned a story way back he might have seen on TV. It was about a fire fighter catching an adult jumping outta a window of a burning building (or something to that effect). This is interesting because the fire person actually took hold of said individual.

My comment to this: I would try really hard to grab someone falling from a window (usually). However, if it were a woman, I would put more effort. This is not being perverted, but being rational. There is, after all, very little chance of copping a feel. If it were a man falling, I would try to catch him, but I would be prevented from “GRABBING” as much. Thing is…the thingy. I don’t wanna grab onna some guy’s wang-tang while he’s on the way down (read into it as you like). Me thinks like this:

Attempt to catch: “Hey! I got ya!!!”

Realization of what part of Ya I got: “...Ughhh…”

One of two things happens:

1. Drop old bath robed man and he plummets to cold earth.

2. Maintain hold on robed man’s member as his body plummets to cold earth…then drop old man’s (dis)member.

Then one more thing happens:

Poor dead wet bath robed man lies splat on the ground below, but at least he was fondled before his death. And guess who did the fondling? Yes, I go to bed with the knowledge of fondling an old man just before he passed on. Wonder if he liked it?

Moral:

Don’t let me be a fire person. Let The Jeff grab some dude’s tally-whacker as the naked freak jumps outta a burning building in his bath robes. However, do let me watch as I would love to bug Jeff or whoever rips the poor guy’s sausage off ‘im.

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Falling Rocks

Apparently, this morning I picked Billy up and he saw them rocks falling perrty good. I didn’t because he said so. After said rock watcher woke up, I asked him about the rocks, and where I could see them. He said, “Daddy has to close eyes and see them.”

Yup, me kid’s a duffus. But at least he has youth to explain the nonsense. I got…well, lack of sanity. I think a little squirrel gave that to me in a bag. The one he hit me over the head with.

Breaking Toilets

Ever think you’d fart so hard the damn toilet couldn’t handle it? I’m still trying.

Life is a musical

I want my life to be made into a musical.

Songs and dance will all be made with reference to yours truly.

Yes, this makes little sense, but neither do I.

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81 Points

Kobe Bryant did something interesting. He scored 81 points in a game. While that is all well and fine, his team scored a total of 122 against 104 for Toronto. While this was a high point game, and his teamates did score 41 points, what the hell was he thinking? Ball hog? Yes. Show off? Of course (he is his team's star player, isn't he). Team player? No.

While he is supposed to be a team leader, what is he showing?

It seems like his strategy is some kind of JUST WATCH WHILE I GO ALL THE WORK thinking. No wonder Shaq moved.

Do I think Kobe is worthless? No.

Do I think he needs to get his team in better shape to win? Yes.

Do I think he's doing this to compensate for something else? Yes

Does he need to be a TEAM player? Well, unless he wants to play one-on-team against the NBA's best I suggest he start trying. If I was a coach of any ability, I'd take him out before he hit sixty (points).

Should other teams already know how to beat the Lakers? Yes. Eliminate Kobe.

Moral (wow, 2 in one post):
To be the best at what you do is important, especially in a teamwork environment. Remembering the team helps improve relationships and show a true professional.
However, when you take over the team and run the show by yourself, you kill the team.
(If you can do it by yourself, why include the team at all? Just erase the bottlenecks and the production like runs fine...till it over Heats, Kobe.)